Irreverent Read online

  My brow crinkles as I recall the incident that had caused me to be there. Another unpleasant memory takes hold. So clear, so strong, I can almost smell the faint medicinal scent I’d grown to hate. My mother is holding me down. A needle is being inserted in my arm, restraints are being placed on my hands and feet. I’m struggling, sobbing, and my father and Constance are nowhere in sight.

  My mother looks concerned as she speaks to a man in a white coat. “And you’re sure this will cure her?”

  I can’t see the man clearly with his mask on, but his eyes are a deep green and so icy cold I flinch as he approaches. The man’s eyes crinkle as he laughs but there is no humour in his voice. “It’s completely painless and she won’t remember any of it.” My mother’s face blurs and the sterile hospital room evaporates like steam. The floor races up to meet me, and my entire body starts to tremble so violently I drop the box.

  The silver instruments spill over the floor making Cristan spin around. His eyes are wide and his face is creased with worry. “What happened?”

  I can barely find the words, let alone express them. My throat is raw, eyes filling with angry tears. I grind my teeth together and wrap my arms around myself to fight the shiver overtaking me. “It wasn’t supposed to be painful,” I mumble.

  Cristan sucks in a breath and grabs my shoulders again to force me to look up at him. “What wasn’t?”

  I’m so angry, I can barely speak, but the desperate grip he has on me and the way his eyes are searching mine loosen something inside me. “I don’t know what it was. I just know how it felt.”

  His cheeks blaze and I see the anger flickering in his eyes. He’s still gripping me, but he’s flinching like he’s feeling the pain that I’m starting to remember. His voice is a flat monotone. “E.S.T?” I try to shrug but I can’t raise my shoulders. He looks downwards, no longer looking at me, as though he can’t bear to. He releases me and steps away. His face contorts as pain and anger take control. “How old were you?”

  I close my eyes and try to find something to cling to that identifies when it happened, but too many memories surface, bashing together so painfully I whimper and grip my head. It hurts so bad even thinking about the room. With the instruments, the machine, and the man with the cold green eyes and false smile. I blink to stop the tears but they only increase as I think of all the times I went to the hospital with my mother to see the man with half a face.

  Cristan isn’t looking at me. He looks like he wants to punch something. And for the first time since meeting him, I think I can understand his anger and his reluctance to speak of what happened to him.

  Chapter 6

  Cristan.

  I’m not the only one. It should make me feel better, but it doesn’t. It makes me feel a million times worse. Would I have done anything differently if I’d known she was going through the same thing? Probably not. And there is no way they put her through the same things they did to me.

  I’m shaking with anger and disgust. I shut my emotions down before they erupt and I lose focus. I’m torn between trying to comfort her and needing to get the panelling off so I can disrupt the signal in case someone comes to check on us. There’s a chance I triggered something in my haste to see what I’m working with, so I need to be quick.

  Mallory seems to be teetering between anger and tears, and I don’t blame her. Electromagnetic shock therapy is pretty much one of the most excruciatingly painful things they do to Irrelevants to try to fix them. Now that the meds are working their way out of her system, she’s likely going to remember all the crap they’ve subjected her to over the years. She slumps down on the bed and stares at her hands. I figure she needs a second to process everything, and we’re running out of time so I carry on with the panel.

  The internals are antiquated, and whoever made it had some skill, but they didn’t factor in someone like me who’s had nothing better to do than make sure they can never be locked inside a room ever again. Even though I’m trying hard not to think about what else they’ve done to Mallory, I lose myself in doing something I always had a knack for, figuring out ways to work around G tech and hacking it.

  I’m pretty sure I’ve got it so I wave my hand in front of the door sensor and feel a smug satisfaction when it opens. I grin at Mallory as she gets up from the bed. Her surprise is evident and it seems to have chased away some of the shock and pain she must be feeling. I stick my head outside and scan the hallway. We can’t go back the way we came since it’s monitored by a camera, so I head in the opposite direction and hope there is access to the rest of the old zoo.

  Mallory is right behind me as we hurry down the illuminated hallway. Midway down, a door indicates a stairwell so I open a non-automated door and check inside quickly before heading through the threshold. There aren’t any signs inside the stairwell, so I make my best guess and head downwards. I have no idea if the control room would be located at a vantage point or in the basement. Depending on what’s inside it, some items need better air circulation and below ground makes more sense.

  We carry on down the stairs, my nerves growing as I listen for tell-tale signs that someone is on to us. I’m not seeing any indications there are cameras in the stairwells or anywhere else, but no lights don’t mean they aren’t watching. Mallory seems to acknowledge this isn’t the time to be talking, and I’m relieved. She must be experiencing a multitude of emotions right now, but she’s keeping herself together. A lot of Irrelevants wouldn’t be able to. I’ve seen some new arrivals flip out over a change in menu, losing a shirt, or someone raising their voice. Those are the Irrelevants that spend most of their time alone in their unit or working on assigned jobs.

  We come to another door and I open it a crack. I hold my breath as movement from inside the darkened room makes me freeze. I hear them before I can locate them. It’s Kit and Trey and they’re half-arguing, half-undressing each other.

  “You sure they’re locked up for the night?” Kit asks.

  Trey grabs her by the hips and pulls her into him. “I told you, I programmed an auto-lock.”

  Kit’s face is obscured, but I hear her huff a breath. “Fine, but this means nothing. And you tell no one. Especially not Jackson. Got it?”

  When I see Trey’s hands slide upwards to Kit’s shirt buttons and her hands start unbuckling his trousers, I don’t bother to listen in anymore. I back away to ease the door shut and press a finger to my lips at Mallory’s questioning expression. I take Mallory’s hand and lead her away. We carry on downstairs until the air thins and cools enough to reassure me there must be something worthwhile down here.

  I make sure Mallory is standing behind me before I ease open the door. A loud squeak as the door opens makes me flinch and pause with my hand still on the cool metal handle. Nothing happens, so I peer around the door and am greeted by a variety of blinking lights and screens. I don’t breathe for a few seconds as I scope the room to make sure Jackson isn’t inside. Hell, at this point anyone could be hiding behind any of the custom screens and I don’t even have my gun on me.

  I skirt the room with Mallory’s hand in mine and check out all the equipment they have. Some of the stuff I recognise from the old city, from salvaged parts, from G issue tech inside the Unit, but a lot of it is unfamiliar. I take a seat at a console and do a quick check to see if there is a security protocol that I’ll have to override, and I start tapping on the screen board as Mallory slides into the chair beside me.

  I focus on what I’m doing and lose myself in the codes and numbers I’ve always found relaxing. If I had more time, I’d see what’s on their internal server, dig up some dirt on Jackson Stone, and maybe I’ll come back to investigate it, but right now I need to find a way to send a message that’s secure and untraceable.

  * * *

  Mallory.

  Cristan is tapping away on the screen, and I know he doesn’t need my help, but I feel like I should be doing something. I need to keep busy, or I’ll start thinking of things I don’t want to right now. I cl
ear my throat and tell him I’ll start looking for a tablet so I can draw. He acknowledges me with a grunt and I know I need to let him concentrate. If this is the control room, there must be tech somewhere even if I can’t see it. The most likely place to store tablets seems to be in the desk pushed along the wall.

  My blisters are stinging as I cross the room. I sink into the chair and hold back a sigh of relief when the weight is off them. I don’t need to check my skin to know it’s still burnt, but the pain is less severe thanks to the balm, and my arms are no longer burning hot to touch.

  I stretch and open the closest drawer. There’s nothing even close to a tablet, but dozens of time slides are inside. My brow knots together as I pick one up and examine it. It doesn’t seem to be any different than the one I was issued. I hadn’t looked hard at Cristan’s but they seem to be identical. I place the time slide back in the drawer and close it, with a thought to tell Cristan when he’s finished.

  The next drawer yields objects I don’t recognise so I close that one too, and try the third and second to last drawer. My heart squeezes in my chest as I see a gun inside. I glance at Cristan but he’s muttering and tapping, so I swallow hard and gingerly pick up the weapon to see if it’s like the one Cristan showed me how to fire. I run my fingers over the grip and hold it closer when I see a tiny scratch mark. I’m puzzling over the way it’s so similar to Cristan’s when I hear him let out a quiet whoop.

  I spin around, still gripping the gun as he turns to grin at me. “Got in. I have a few minutes—" His smile disappears as he sees the gun in my hand. He’s off his chair and stalking towards me before I can blink twice. He stretches out his hand and I willingly give the gun to him. His forehead knots and his lips press together while he studies it. His eyes reach mine and I see a flash of anger I hope isn’t aimed at me on his face. “Where did you find this?”

  I point to the drawer and open the top one with the time slides inside. “I was going to tell you when you got the message through.”

  He nods, but I don’t think he’s really listening, he’s staring at the time slides like they are about to attack him. He shakes his head and scowls. “I better finish up. We need to get back upstairs in case someone comes to check on us.” With a last look at the time slides, he turns on his heel and takes the gun with him. I give up on my search for a tablet, my nerves are too jangled. I grab a few of the time slides and turn them over in my hand.

  The screens are blank, so I place them on the desk and line them up so they are in rows of five. I get to the third row and a slight beep makes me jump. When my heart has calmed, I check the source of the beep. I stare at the tiny screen, not comprehending what I’m seeing.

  A message is blinking at me. The wolf is huffing and puffing and we’re in a house made of straw. Drew.

  I’m so shocked I’m holding Cristan’s time slide in my hands when I saw him throw it away in the wasteland, that I stare dumbfounded. It’s Cristan’s voice and his angry exhalation of air that pulls me from my stupor. I ignore the pain shooting through my feet as I rush to the console he’s still tapping away at. His finger is poised to hit the send button when I grab his arm. He tries to shake me off and sends me a puzzled frown.

  I thrust his time slide under his nose. He looks at me like I’m crazy. “I can’t look at that right now, I literally have two minutes—”

  My voice is high when I interrupt him. “It’s your time slide. And there is a strange message from Drew.”

  His eyes pop open and he grabs the time slide from my hand. He sucks in a breath and his face contorts and reddens. “Damn it.”

  I retake my seat and wince as his finger hovers over the keypad. His jaw works as he hits the cancel button then slams his fist down hard enough for the keypad to jump. Fear floods my body as he pulls out the gun and turns it over in his hands. I’m still confused at the meaning behind the strange message and why he’s not sending a message anymore when a sound coming from behind me makes my skin rise. Cristan grabs me and yanks me out of the chair before I can see who is entering. I stumble into him and he manages to right me and hold the gun outwards.

  Jackson steps through the door and doesn’t seem surprised to see us. He exhales slowly, his posture is relaxed but I can hear the tension in his voice. “I know you’re angry, but you need to listen to me.”

  Cristan’s arm doesn’t waver, but I can almost feel the anger rolling off him. He spits the words like he can harm Jackson with them. “Why? You lied to us so we’d come here, then you locked us up so we couldn’t leave.”

  I’m desperate to understand what is going on, but I can’t, so I stand helplessly as Jackson raises his hands. “You’ve got it backwards. I’m trying to protect you.” Jackson’s eyes flick to me. “Both of you.”

  Cristan barks a bitter laugh confusing me even more. “You want to help us? Let us go, let me see my brother.”

  Jackson shakes his head. “I read the message. That’s why I asked Trey to lock you in. Your Unit has been compromised.”

  Cristan’s eyes widen. “You understood that message? That’s not possible.”

  Jackson lowers his hands. “Third night you were inside, Drew told you a bedtime story. He said the G men were the wolf and the Irrelevants were the pigs inside. He told you the Unit was a house made of brick and mortar, that nothing would get in. That he’d keep you safe and teach you how to keep yourself safe.”

  Cristan seems to have stopped breathing, his fingers are white around the gun. His voice is ragged as he speaks. “How the feck do you know that? Who are you?”

  Jackson’s lips tug into a half-smirk. “I’m the reason you’re finally where you should be.”

  I don’t understand his meaning, but Cristan seems to. He snarls. “You were the one who sent the drone in? That made her look like a bloody G spy?”

  With Jackson’s nod, my body floods with ice. My voice is shaking, my throat dry as I choke out the word. “Why?”

  Cristan is the one who answers as he slowly raises the gun so it’s pointing at Jackson’s head. His tone is oddly flat. “To see what I’d do. What I’m capable of.”

  Jackson’s eyes shift from mine to Cristan’s. A smug smile plays at his lips. “You just needed the right motivation to leave. She gave me the perfect opportunity. All that kissing in the Q Unit, damn, anyone could have walked in, bro.”

  I ball my fists as anger starts to flow unbidden as I see what Jackson has done. He’s been watching not just Cristan but me as well, and he’s manipulated and lied to get us to come out here. I don’t understand his reasoning, all I know is he used me to provoke Cristan, and now Jed and everyone inside the Unit might be in jeopardy.

  Cristan’s cheeks heat, and when Jackson makes a move towards me, the gun goes off with a roar.

  * * *

  Cristan.

  I’m shaking so hard, I’m surprised I even hit him where I intended to. He’s bleeding, yelling at me, and Mallory is staring wide-eyed like she’s in shock. He’s the reason we were forced to run. He’s the reason I had to leave Jed, and the reason Mallory was unfairly accused and threatened. Anger is tearing through me as I stalk to where he’s collapsed. He’s on his knees, gripping his shoulder.

  Blood seeps through his fingers as he scowls up at me. “You fecking lunatic. You could have killed me.”

  Though my thoughts are a tangled mess, I infuse my voice with ice as I raise the gun. “You installed cameras in 2B? When?”

  Jackson groans and eases himself to his feet. I back up in case he makes a grab for the gun. Something in the way he’s carrying himself makes me think he’s no stranger to pain, and that even wounded he could do a lot of damage. He shakes his head, his eyes flicking from me to Mallory who’s still staring at me and at Jackson like we’re aliens from another planet.

  I push aside my concern for her and try to figure out if Jackson is trying to lie to me again. “I didn’t install them. The G did. When they built the place.”

  Heat tears through my already pumpe
d muscles. I’m not sure if I’m angrier at him, at the G, or myself for not considering they’d invade our privacy like that. “You hacked in so you could watch us too? Why?”

  Jackson slumps against the wall like he’s trying to conserve energy. His face is getting paler by the second, but his voice is still strong so I don’t worry too much that he’s going to bleed out before I get the answers I need. “I hacked into the feeds of all the Units,” he says.

  My lip curls as I think of all the Irrelevants being monitored so closely by a government who isn’t supposed to care enough to bother. “What are you, some kind of a pervert?”

  Jackson chuckles. “Nah. It started out as a way to steal food and extra ammo, to see what the G was sending out to the Irrelevants in different Units. I wasn’t watching anyone in particular ‘til a year ago, when you hacked into the G server, pulled a bunch of stuff down, and you got my attention.”

  I clench my jaw so hard it starts to ache. I can only imagine what it was I took from the server. I’ve stolen so many files, I haven’t even looked through half of them. I narrow my eyes, and if it weren’t for Mallory I’d ask him what it was that tipped him off. I chance a look at her to make sure she’s okay. She looks a little wary and tired, but otherwise, she’s still holding together. She’s standing close so I reach for her hand and she responds by linking her fingers with mine.

  I give her as a warm a smile as I can manage under the circumstances. She doesn’t seem as afraid as I’d have expected so I ask Jackson one of the dozens of questions I’ve wanted to ask since meeting him. “What are you doing out here that you need me involved?”